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MRI September 20, 2018

Posted by fmmh in : Ramblings , add a comment

Here’s some of the images from my MRI on April 10, 2018. I’ll upload more if I feel up to it. There were 394 images in total; with & without contrast.

I never made a follow-up with a neurologist to find out the results. However, it looks to me like temporal lobe epilepsy is evident and vasculitis. I suspect lupus.

If any brave neurologist wants to post anonymously a comment below, please do so and list your credentials.

The radiologist’s report stated:

Scattered nonspecific foci of increased T2/flair signal seen within the subcortical and deep white matter of both cerebral hemispheres. Finding may be of no clinical significance. This could represent minimal changes of chronic small vessel ischemic disease. Broad differential for white matter signal changes includes infectious, inflammatory and demyelinating processes. No evidence of acute infarct or hemorrhage. No focal intrarenal mass or enhancing lesion seen on this motion artifact degraded study.

Background September 19, 2018

Posted by fmmh in : Ramblings , add a comment

Maybe I should consider documenting what’s really going on with me? If this blog continues, most details will be omitted because I cannot bear to re-read things I’ve written. These introspective writings never represent who I am as a person, but much like artwork hanging, it’s a static moment in time I am forced to relive only when I stand in front of that image, an often distorted one. It feels better after recording my thoughts on paper or digital media to dispose of them quickly.


* Multiple trauma survivor
* 100% VA-rated disabled veteran
* INFP & 9 Peacemaker
* History of choriocarcinoma (2001), diabetes, hypertension
* Diagnosed PTSD, Bipolar I w/psychosis, hypothyroidism, pleurisy, vocal cord dysfunction, non-alcoholic fatty liver disease, vasculitis, arthritis, lipomas, obstructive sleep apnea, asthma, anemia of unknown etiology, chronic pain & fatigue, skin rashes/allergies
* Suspected misdiagnosis of Fibromyalgia
* Years of chronic inflammation & high ESR & CRP levels *FUCKING DOCTORS!
* Undiagnosed but evidence of Raynaud’s disease and seizures (temporal lobe epilepsy probably causing the psychoses;) also family history of seizures
* Undiagnosed but suspect all my issues have been Systemic Lupus Erythematosus (neuropsychiatric lupus or NPSLE), especially because of family history
* 365 lbs (in 2012) and lost over 24″ in abdomen via detox protocols, unsure of my current weight now but maybe around 215 lbs?

I suffer a lot from dissociation, de-realization, flashbacks, and extreme anxiety. My coping skills to survive day-to-day stressors includes mostly music, laughter, and avoidance. If I’m not multitasking, then I’m probably dissociating or having a seizure (lol).